Oh my.

     I updated my blogger interface today. This is going to take some getting used to, it's completely different!! It took me much longer then it probably should have to figure out how to even write this post.  I've been so wiped out the last two days. I haven't been able to sleep at all at night, and I tried napping during the day but couldn't sleep then either.

     I keep thinking of all the exciting things I'm going to make once we move. New recipes I want to try and all that good stuff. I'd do it now, but my lack of counters makes it nearly impossible. I can't wait to use my nice big island. I'm gonna make shit I have to roll out just cause I can. PIZZA?! SURE! RAVIOLI?! NP! PIE?! DON'T MIND IF I DO! Apparently that's all I know how to make that requires a rolling pin.

     I'm not doing so great at eating clean. Actually, I'm doing terribly. I've managed to lower my sodium from 2500mg down to 1500mg (the Canadian reccomended amount) but I'm still feeling like I'm not cooking as much whole foods as I should be. Using premade sauces n junk is just way too convinent for my family.  I'm staying within my calories with no problem though, and all my nutrients so as long as I'm sticking to that then I'm already doing better then I was before and eventually I'll be where I want to be whether weight wise or food wise.

     It's an ugly day again today. I'm pretty sure I blinked and missed summer this year. I'm going to make soup for dinner. I was at safeway and thought, oh I'll just get some sandwich meat and make soup and a sandwhich... well eff that. That shit is INSANE. Even the "natural" meats were 570mg sodium per 4 slices. Craziness I tell you. CRAZINESS. So I'm going to make some chicken salad. I also just realized we don't have any lettuce. I'll have to go back and pick some up.

     Now let's see if I can figure out how to post this bad boy.

Watch out Edmonton

      This mama is license to kill. Err... drive... with proper fully licensed supervision. Yay me? It only took me 20 years to grow the balls to do my Class 7 (learners) driving exam. It's a shame isn't it? Actually the only reason I decided to is the recent onset of weird bus phobia. I used to love taking the bus. Either way I feel like a grown-up now, and in 1 year I'll be showing off my new car, and hopefully a new bod. Things just can't get any better for me this year. Everything is just falling into place and life is *so* perfect. Eeek. Exciting.

     I started my cleanse Sunday, and I think I've finally stopped pooping. Good to know, I'm sure. I have killer heartburn though which had started to go away. The stuffed peppers I made the other day were A-MAZE-ING. As promised here is the recipe. Tonight I am torn between soup or stew and porkchops that King Adriano wants. Tough choice. It's so ugly out it's perfect soup weather.

     I've been thinking/trying to nap since Nina went down at noon and haven't been able to sleep. Lawn Maintenance just started a lawn mower right outside her window and do u think she could be bothered about it? Of course not. Man, I would love to be able to sleep like a baby. I wonder if there is such a thing as pork chop soup.

Joining a blogger challenge!!

     After my post about goals the other day, Ayla @ Life as a fat girl joined a challenge that I think ties in perfectly with my goal to set goals. Originally from *Less* of  Me, More of Him, the GIVE YOURSELF THE BEST GIFT Challenge.

"The point of this challenge is to be mindful all through the Fall and the Holiday Season ahead, be mindful of what you really want."

Now, as per the rules, I need to post my statement and action points. 

Statement

     By the end of this holiday season, I want to feel confident and happy. I don't want to have any regrets. This holiday season I want to give myself the gift of health, and weight loss, and to have the feeling of accomplishment. 

Action points

• I will eat out less. I will eat clean. I will make better choices when I do eat out. I will stay within my calories, no exceptions.
• I will set a new goal, either a scale goal, or an NSV for every month.
• I will workout. I won't depend on diet alone for weight loss. I will work out 3 days a week, whether it's 30 minutes, or 2 hours. I will commit to 3 designated work outs a week.
• I will be more (pro)active. I will do things. I will not procrastinate, I will do what needs to be done, as it needs doing or before.
• I will plan my meals in advance.
• I will try something new once a week. Food, recipe, activity, whatever.
• I will be nicer to my husband.

Eating Clean.

     Before I was eating better, better then I was before anyways lol. Today, I'm eating clean. I looked up some recipes from Eating Clean Mag and todays menu is looking good. I had oatmeal for breakfast, and whole wheat pasta with broccoli & garlic and parm cheese for lunch and tonights dinner is some very delish sounding stuffed peppers. It only added up to ~700 calories so I added some cucumbers & water melon for snacks, maybe I'll have seconds at dinner. If they're good I'll share the recipe. Last time I made stuffed peppers they were gross. Probably my fault, I'm a terrible chef.

     I'm going to wait to start the cleanse with Ayla, my usual partner in crime. So that means tonight is my last chance to celebrate the anniversary of my marriage to that weirdo, Adrian, with the biggest bottle of wine we can find. 4 years-ish as I like to call it. My dad took the baby so I get some baby-free time which doesn't happen often. My plan to spend it napping, and lazing about in bed is not going as planned. I ended up vacuuming and making lunch. Now off to shower. or nap. or shower. Choices I tell you. Oh wait, I'll probably have enough time for both. What a glorious day!!

Happy anniversary shithead!

     Not that he'll ever know. He does not subscribe to my blog, I don't think he knows what a blog is to be quite honest. Oh well, that just means I can blame him for everything. AMIRITE?!

Renew Life FirstCleanse.

     A girl on a forum I'm in asked if anybody tried it, and no one has. I've decided to try it. Who knows what it will do, if anything. It's an all natural body cleansing something or other that... I probably should have looked into this more before buying. It's all natural, and I don't have to fast. Just eat clean, drink lots of water. If nothing else then at least I'll eat clean for the next two weeks lol.

     Todays dinner was delish, amazing actually. Chicken salad melt & spring salad. Start the cleanse tomorrow sooo we'll see how it goes.

Goals.

     Today I was showering and thinking about some threads I had read on MFP. One of them was about goals for September. While I manage to do okay with my NSV, probably due to no specific time limits, any time I set a goal I never actually commit. I never set a goal and reached it. I can't even finish the 30DS for petes sake. So then I thought, well no point in setting a goal if I'm not going to actually do it and put it out of my mind. Does it seem totally ridiculous that I just give up before even trying or is it better to not try and not fail? Well, it can't hurt to try can it. So this month I'm setting goals.

     In September I want to do the couch 2 5 k. I want to stay under my calories every day. I want to lose 6 lbs and put me at an even 20lbs lost. My goal for September is to reach my goals LOL.

     Thinking about goals made me realize that in January my goal was to lose 70lbs by my 26th birthday, January 19th 2012. In order for me to reach this goal I still need to lose 56Lbs. 56Lbs in exactly 21 weeks from today. Which means I have to lose 3Lbs a week or 11.2lbs a month. (2.67Lbs but whatever lol) I'm not very good at 1.) losing weight, or 2.) setting goals. I have to wonder if this is realistic? Should I give myself a few extra weeks and say Valentines day? Or does it not matter and I should have no specific time? For other people who are losing do you have a set time you are trying to lose by or do you just go with the flow?

     Maybe I'll reassess at the end of September and see how on track I am then. The more I think about it, the less likely it seems that I'll be able to reach my goal by my birthday. While disappointing I'm glad I realized it now. I can adjust and still feel good. I feel good now.

You wanna know what I did today?

     I took a toddler... on a 4 hour bus ride. AM I FUCKING INSANE!?!?! Nope. I just have an angel child, today. Oh well we're home now and pooped. I'm going to sleep good tonight. I never understand what it is about a long bus ride that makes you tired? It's not like I was actually DOING anything. I was sitting. I`ve also started to notice that my anxiety is getting out-of-control on buses. In fact it's the only time I feel it. I got home and had some pasta for dinner and now I'm lounging about in bed. Skipped teen mom tonight, I'll have to watch it tomorrow. Maybe as a treat for actually working out.

     Fucking hell. Have I mentioned how excited I am to move?! It will be nice to be able to sit in my own bed and not have second hand cigarette smoke wafting into my windows, stinkin up my biz. Really though, I'm probably being completely insane. It's their yard, they're smoking outside. Wtf do I expect them to do?  4 more weeks... 4 more weeks. Then I have my big house, with my big yard.

     I found a recipe for "Sassy water" which is part of a bigger diet plan that I didn't bother to look into, but I decided to try and give the water a try. Maybe it's omg-amazing. It's pretty good. Smells like marijuana though. Adrian thinks I'm nuts, but i swear thats what it smells like. It smells like my dad. Maybe I should look into the Sassy Water diet, but I have such a hard time committing to anything. Jillians Shred, the C25K, though I've never actually tried a diet before. I'm probably better off sticking to counting my calories, I seem to be doing okay so far and I get to try a  lot of great new recipes and sometimes some not so great recipes.

     I want to do the C25K, I really do but going to the gym every day is such a PITA and really I'm scared if I run in public I'm going to fall flat on my face. I have visions of pushing the stroller and it gets stuck in a crack and we both go tumbling over, because 4rlz this is the kind of things that happen to me. Sept Adrian works less hours so maybe I'll start then so I can go alone with out the baby. Who wants to wait, not me. I'll start tomorrow... at the gym... where i have to go anyways. Ok, pinkie promiseeee.

The Paain the painnn it doesn't go awaaaay.

     Actually it does when I sit down. I woke up this morning with a bad ass pain in my right side. It's not Adrian cause he's at work. It goes away when I sit down though. I won't be going to the mall today ( which also means no gym today) which is fine it's a beautiful day I didn't want to go anyways. I will go for a short walk, nothing special but I'm a slacker and I need to go to the grocery store anyways to get supplies for tonights dinner. The menu for today was Breakfast Toastadas, a turkey sausage and rice for lunch and dinner will be chicken kabobs with Israeli salad and spring greens maybe.

     I did my own laundry today. Which really seems like a normal thing to do but I actually hate it and usually con Adriano into it most of the time. 90% of the time... who am i kidding... 100% of the time. I've been getting back into my rut again, of doing nothing at all. Literally.  So today I'm going to fight through this horrific ( I *might* be exaggerating) pain and go for a walk and take Nina shopping and come home and do more of my own laundry and clean the kitchen. U know... stuff I should probz do every day but i just don't feeeel like it.

     My cats giving me side eye. Creeps me out. He pee'd on my bed and I'm sure he's just waiting for a chance to do it again. He's all "grrrr, I'm Henrey and Ima pee on ur bed when ur not looookin". Lol cat my ass. he's a hater cat.

     Now, who wants to come make my bed?! It's cat pee free. Promise.

Husbands shouldn't let wives blog drunk.

     That's all I have to say about that! Well if nothing else then my rye and coke zero madness not only encouraged, but forced, me to stay well within my calories due to the fact I couldn't eat anything for the better part of the day. Ack! I deserve it. I just realized I'm sitting in the dark. Todays dinner was subway. Actually today's lunch and dinner were both Subway. Adrian went out for dinner and I was dying on the couch. I'm even too tired to watch Big Brother. Which is fine since I already know who wins HOH. I quite literally HID in my house today. Last night I asked my neighbor to turn her music down at 1:30am and she invited me to her kids birthday party. Awkward. I told her I wasn't going to be home.

     Monday tomorrow, beginning of another looooooooong long week. I'm going to go back to planning my meals the night before because I tend to get off track more when I don't. Also, I have to go to the gym to switch my information over to the new location... might as well  get a work in while I'm there? Maybe? Man, there's nothing I hate more then the gym. It's helpful in winter though with these Alberta winters. I should drink some tea.

Ceeeleeebrate good times, c'mon!

     Who has two thumbs and ate too much chinese food last night?! THIS GUY! Totes worth it. Nothing like celebrating weight loss by putting the pounds back on. Just means extra walking for me today. It's okay, beautiful day. Tomorrow is going to be nice too. I had Chinese food for breakfast. OK. My bad. That probably wasn't a great idea.
   
      I built all my boxes... and have not filled them. Every time I say ok im going to start riiiiiight now... i come up with some reason not to, like feeding the kid...updating my blog...napping... The important things. At least I have time, lots of time... too much time. Another night of yelling, and police helicopters, and drunk people. I have to wonder where they come from. I don't live anywhere NEAR a bar. I do however, live in between two liquor stores and a McDonalds. Which for some people could be a pretty solid Friday night.

     I thought about buying a kitchenaid mixer for my new house since I'll have all the room... glooooooorious room... but then I realized I have no idea how to cook anything. Which reminds me I have no idea what to have for supper... and I'm thinking turkey burger and salad. Maybe a rye and coke zero for a treat if I actually put something into my boxes.

I'm feeling good.

     No, I'm not feeling good. That is a lie. I FEEL FAN-FUCKING-TASTIC! After weeks of my non-moving scale when I weighed myself today... it was down TWO lbs. Total of 14lbs in just over 2 months. I'm happy-ish, with the total weight loss but I know if I tried harder that I would be getting more significant results. Slow and steady wins the race? Either way, every time I see a loss I feel reenergized and more motivated then I was the day before. Specially these last few weeks being stuck at 170. On the button. It was like torture. Heading into a few busy weeks now so hoping to keep on track.

     I did end up buying new pots yesterday from Canadian Tire. I remember as a kid my dad used to call it crappy tire all the time lol. Brand new Lagostina pots on sale from 369.99 for 139.99. I can't wait to move into my new kitchen and start cooking some GOOD STUFF.

     I feel like I'm in such a good place these days. My depression has nearly vanished and I'm feeling better about myself, and all the great things going on in our lives right now and most importantly I'm feeling really happy with my marriage and the way everythings been going. We had a really rough year last year and now I feel like we're finally getting things into a good place and heading into an even better place. I just could not be any happier. Just a few short weeks till we're in our new place. Adrian is buying a new car. I'm buying a treadmill since winters here are the pits and the closest gym location ( spa lady ) is pretty far from my new place. Feels like everything is falling into place. :)

Upgrade ya!

     I woke up this morning with every intention to hot-pink up my blog, only to log on and find I have a new man follower. I went with my second favorite thing to hot pink and that, of course, is cats. My scale is still broken. Which is fine because I am going to pack it up soon so I won't even have to worry about it until after I move. On the subject of moving...last night Adrians friend said he was excited to help us move because he likes driving big trucks. How perfect.

     I have a lot of junk I need to purge. Mostly baby items, jumper, saucer, swing. It's amazing how much room it all takes up isn't it. Also! I'm going to buy a new set of pots and pans. Our new place has one of those cool hanging pot racks and my pots are crappy so I thought I would treat myself, since I put off getting my braces lol. I'll have to start looking into that. I need to buy a lawn mower too. Wtf do i know about lawn mowers?

     Well my friend was gone on a trip but now she's home so I'm hoping we can motivate each other to get our butts back in gear.  U HEAR THAT MRS. I HAVENT LOGGED ON FOR 3 DAYS?! DO YOU?! u no who u r...

Today is a grey day.

     Looks like rain. Do you know what that means?! SOUP DAY!! yum. I have some spinach and zucchini i need to use. For some reason Adrian ( he gets the blame for everything in this blog lol) bought like 10 when we were grocery shopping the other day. I think he was trying to give me a hint? You want zucchini? OH OK THEN. JUST SAY SO, OR BUY 10. Whatever works right.

     The guy is calling my references for the house we applied for. Fingers crossed!! He said we'll hear back by the end of the week either way. It had a great kitchen, with counter space and a pantry. Srs. I don't know if you guys remember the photos of my kitchen but my counter space is nadda.

This is not a kitchen that inspires healthy eating.

Supersize it.

     Adrian went to get subs for dinner. shithead brought me back a super sized iced tea. No matter how many times I tell that man I won't drink juice... he still buys it for me. Oh well, it's the thought that counts. We went to see a house today, it was nice but just driving there seemed like a mission. Maybe we'll wait until the 1st and start looking for something on the West. I wouldn't mind moving but for Adrian to get to work it's a pretty long commute. Nina threw up on the way home.

     I played a lot of angry birds. Why so angry, angry bird?

I think My scale is broken.

     It has to be, that's the only explanation. It's been stuck at 170 for as long as I can remember! Oh well. It'll move when it wants.

     So after a long discussion and weighing the pro's and con's we've decided that moving is more important and I'll wait until after Christmas to get my braces. It sucks, but after 4 nights of not only us, but the baby being woken up by people yellings/fighting/ringing our door bell/coming to our house looking for drugs... it's best for the fam now if we move. We're looking for a house but with our budget it seems impossible. We're going to see one on the north side Sunday night, which seems like a whole world away. Which is weird because both of my parents live there... not that they would ever come see me anyways. We're also going to look at two duplexes ( duplexi?) on the west end so we can stay close to the mall, and playgroup and just about everything we know lol. Adrian hasn't lived anywhere but the West End since he came to Canada and I've lived here most of my teenage/adult life. We just want somewhere quieter, newer, and bigger so we can raise Nina in a decent neighborhood and maybe, MAYBE, have another baby, MAYBE, some day... not soon lol. So I guess we'll see Sunday. The house on the north side is nice, it's really beautiful and it has 3 bathrooms so it would be nice but I do worry about being so far from where I'm comfortable. Maybe though it would be a nice change. I call it the blue house. So, wish me luck tomorrow!

   

Just for shits and giggles.

1:00PM - I'm going to venture out to safeway and see if I can find the ingredients for Lunch and dinner...Open-faced chicken salad melt, and Cheeseburger mac attack from my HG cook book. I'll log in the recipes on my calorie counting site and let's see how accurate this is. ( I already did breakfast.)

 2:30PM    So far, it's a bust. Apparently laughing cow cheese is not sold in Alberta? I bought regular light swiss cheese. Also, Safeway does not sell gigantic packs of broccoli in cheese sauce. The recipe calls for 24oz, or 6 cups, of frozen Green Giant Cauliflower & Cheese sauce. The biggest I found was 250ml and I most certainly was not paying 3 dollars x 6packages. 18 dollars for processed cheese and what may or may not be real cauliflower loaded in salt. I have light cheddar at home and some brocolli and left over veggies from the other day. So basically I'm making... not this recipe, considering I wasn't going to use the crock pot to begin with. Other then that I did get/have everything I need for the open faced chicken salad melt, but im using skim mozza instead of skim swiss cheese slices since I already have those here lol.

Breakfast - Hola Breakfast Tostada.
My version turned out okay. I'd make it again if I want something spicy. I used two whole eggs, diced tomatoes, onion, red pepper and light cheddar on a toasted dempters whole wheat wrap. Sour cream and salsa on top.

Lunch - Open faced Chicken Salad Melt.
Open-faced Chicken Salad Melt.
Followed her recipe, it was ok but I don't really like the tang mustard adds. My version was 3 calories under, and 400 more in sodium. Could be the different cheese I used, or could be the types of bread.

Dinner - Cheeseburger Mac Attack.
Cheeseburger Mac Attack
Well the same until you get to the cauliflower & cheese. I used 2 cups of broccoli, half cup of onion, 1 cup of light cheddar and one cup of light Swiss. Also I used 1/4 cup more macaroni. Here's the funny part, Mine had only 20 more calories per service, and 368mg LESS sodium. It's obviously not dinner yet so I hope it tastes half decent. Adrians not much of a critic, i doubt he even tastes anything the way he inhales it and even if it's awful he says it's delish lol.

     Assuming I eat 2 servings of dinner, and a skinny cow cookies n cream ice cream sandwich, i'll still be 44 calories under for the day.1156.and 468mg over in sodium then I would like to be.

Hot Dog Stir-Fry.

     Sounds disgusting doesn't it? That just about sums up my Hungry Girl 300 UNDER 300 cookbook. I was so excited for the breakfast ideas mostly. It's the hardest meal for me to plan out without having the same thing every day. This book was no help. At all. Almost EVERY breakfast "recipe" was ~1000mg of sodium. They almost ALL used "liquid egg substitute", or processed cheese. I don't know, they may be low in calories, but I like my food to be...real. The BLT pizza looked good, but I wish they had shown how to make your OWN pizza dough, or sauce for the pizza. I'm so disappointed. There will be no hot dog stir fry in this families future. I'm going to try out the "Hola Breakfast Tostada" with some changes (like real egg whites! fancy!) I don't think I'll be using, or sharing any recipes from here but I will look through and hopefully find some good ideas or recipes that I can tweak. I don't recommend the book either way, you can find all their recipes on the website. I wish I had known lol.

Longest day of life?! I THINK SO!

     At least we made it through, alive. Both of us... barely. After 4 hours of crying and a warm bath, it's finally asleep. oh-my-gosh. We're okay, we made it through the day and now we're both in much better moods. It must be frustrating though being a baby and not being able to tell some one what you want. Oh well. Tomorrow will be a better day. We missed swim lessons AGAIN.

    I'm still under my calories for the day which is both surprising and not so much at the same time. On one hand I didn't stress eat like I normally would, on the other hand I'm pretty sure it's just cause the kitchen is a disaster and I can't be bothered to make anything to eat. which means Adriano is picking up take-out on his way home. Secretly I'm hoping it's something fattening and delish. Like pasta from the Pasta Deli kiosk in West Ed. With their super greasy alfredo sauce and the chicken baked in cheese and grease. The angel on the other shoulder is saying nooo get something healthy like a pita wrap or a sub. I have 799 calories to spare. Maybe more if the baby wakes up before Adrians home and we go for a walk or something. I'm starting to get scared to go outside at night.

     The night before last I was woken up by what sounded like a mating whale behind my house. It was a man, face down, crying in the grass(wtf? Where did he come from?) I ended up calling the police who gave him a sobriety test. He fell down before they even got him to his feet and tried crawling away. While it's pretty sad I couldn't help but think "that guys gonna have a hang over". An ambulance came to get him. I hope he's okay. his shirt was on the sidewalk this morning but was gone when I got home from wal-mart. Bizarre neighborhood I live in. I can't wait to move in January. While it's not as exciting as moving back to BC, I'm so glad to be out of the ghetto. We'd be able to move in September but we're spending a lot of money so I can get braces. (we have no coverage) so we decided to wait until January so it's not such a strain on the budget. I really hate it here so much, maybe I should get the braces in Jan and move in September. It really would be easier to move in better weather, and find an orthodontist closer to the new place. Decisions, decisions.

I think I'm having a mental breakdown.

     I'm going on 3 hours of non.stop.crying. The baby, and myself... well like 2 minutes for me. You know what I mean though. Every time I finally get her quiet in her crib a car comes, lawn mower, fucking garbage truck. I'm so fucking frustrated I don't know what to do. She just won't stop screaming. I wish I knew what to do. It's so stupid cause all I can think of is that I wish I had a mom who could help. A mom I could call and ask what to do., or to come help me. I'm losing my mind.

Today

10:00AM. Wake up, oh no.. I have a hang over. Weigh myself, YES. Success. 170.8LBS.My camera batteries are dead, so I charge them. I make Nina breakfast, cream cheese on toast. She's apparently figured out that she can infact eat the cream cheese with out the toast. Turn on the baby sitter... err I mean the TV. Put diapers on for a wash, fold towels, hang the babies clothes, put laundry away, diapers on for another wash, play with Nina, pack up diapers to take outside... looks like rain. Baby goes for a nap. My batteries are charged. Hang the diapers in the bathtub. Clean the bedroom, clean the kitchen, pick up toys. My house was a disaster by 11:30AM.

12:00PM. Noons pm right? IDGAF. It was noon. Im tired as heck already. The hanggg over. Mom needs a nap too I think.

3:00PM. Banging on wall, oh shit. Babies awake and I slept for 3 hours.It was a great nap. Clean the babies room. Ok, let's make some lunch then. Penne with cheese sauce for Nina, leftover turkey burger for me. Yummy. Finally some food.

4:30PM. Play with Nina, it's my favorite part of the day. Looks like rain but still hasn't rained. I'm a sad guy cause I would have loved to sunbleach the diapers, they're a little...stained. We read some books, we look out the window, wave to birds and cats, ride on our pink car, she falls and hits her head and cries lots. I feel bad.

6:00PM. Watched the news. Teenager on the loose, has HIV and sleeps around. Hood to know, I'll keep an eye out for her and make sure not to have unprotected sex with her. Really Edmonton? THIS IS HARD HITTING STUFF!

7:00PM. Oh crap. I should start dinner. Text message Adrian. Wtf do u want for dinner? Meatballs. No. Shepards Pie? Maybe. Ok, Shepards pie it is then. We really need to hit up a grocery store. So that's tomorrows plan. Vacuuming  and going to the grocery store. Cook cook cook, oh ya.

7:30PM. Make Nina some dinner, it's almost time for a bath and bed. She has more penne since it was left over from lunch with some carrots and peas. I tried giving her beef but she doesn't seem to care for it. Oh well, her choice. She seems to love the pasta though.

8:25PM. uuuuuuuuuugh the diapers are in the bathtub. What a PITA. No bath for you today Nina. Give her a quick washdown with a wet towel, fresh diaper ( i left the other ones out, I DO change her more then once a day.) Into bed, night night baby.

8:30PM. Must.update.blog.about.day.

8:48PM. Its awake.

I just realized my day is not over yet. Adrians still at work, and my house is back to it's disastrous state. It just makes me wonder why I bother sometimes lol.

Wait wait wait...

     Amazon tracking says my order is out for delivery, which makes me SO HAPPY. It also means no going for a walk, or to the grocery store until it gets here. :(  I'd be so sad if I missed it. Oh well, soon enough... Besides I'm a little scurred to go outside. I live in the ghetto here in Good ol Edmonton and there is a weird old man sitting on my neighbors front lawn reading a news paper. I don't think he belongs to them...I also think he stole their newspaper.

     I FINALLY got some lettuce wraps from Cactus Club last night but I could not track down any nutritional info, even after contacting their head office. I'm a little disappointed and unless I feel like a "splurge" I don't think I'll be eating there any more. Which is really too bad, but I would just like to know what I'm putting in my body. I don't think it's too much to ask. I really like that at The Extreme Pita in West Edmonton Mall that they've started to put up the calories for every wrap right on the menu. I wish everywhere would do that! It really does help me make better choices, or if I go for the higher calorie snack then at least I'm aware.

     To top yesterdays lettuce wrap greatness off, it was Big Brother eviction night AND Jersey Shore Season 3 premiere. I could not have been happier...Unless it was also martini night. It wasn't. Neither is tonight. Bummer. I wonder how many calories are in an apple martini? I don't think I want to know.

     I meant to do a day in the life of me (and Nina)  today but she woke up cranky  so it slipped my mind. I'll go charge my camera batteries so I'll be on the ball tomorrow. I'll warn you all now that it's not very exciting. Lots of cleaning, lots of cooking, and lots of baby.

     The news paper thief is in the garbage can now. The one I get a great view of from my bedroom window. I'll show you tomorrow. It's beautiful when the sun comes up.

It's here!!!

     For the last few days Nina has had a terrible yeast infection. After 2 visits to the doctor and prescriptions that I decided not to fill, I ordered CJ'S BUTTer Spritz PLUS!, and an 8-pack of samples in what sounded like the most amazing scents known to man (cucumber melon, cherry blossom, and best of all? Warm Vanilla Cake ) They arrived today, which is SO much faster then I expected. I ordered Monday evening. They gave me an extra sample so I have 9 all together. Bamboo and Lotus blossom, Lavender & tea tree oil, Cherry Blossom, Coconut Lime Dream, Sweet Orange Essential Oil, Monkey Farts, Ginger Lime, All Natural Mango Sugar & Mint, last but not least Warm Vanilla Cake. I was sad when I got the e-mail that they were out of Cucumber Melon but the extra sample & apology were good enough for me and I quickly got over it. Best of all... they are ALL cloth diaper friendly! So stoked. I hope it helps her poor bottom.

     I had spaghetti for breakfast. Probably not my greatest idea, but it was good. I'm going for a walk later, maybe I'll have breakfast for lunch to even things out!? I don't think it works like that does it. Another nice sunny day today and we're going to go for a walk whenever my little lazy bones wakes up. She's a sleeper.

Poor thing, has my hair. 

     Hopefully my books get here soon. Estimated arrival days is August 8th 2011. Seems so far away. I'm excited the most for the Jaycee Duggard Bio I think. Though the others are exciting as well. I'll make sure to let you know. I'm excited for the recipes in the 300 under 300. Maybe then I won't be eating spaghetti for breakfast. 

Let's talk MACRO NUTRIENTS!

    Now TODAY I am doing good. Like I was yesterday... before I ate half a giant pizza sized cookie before bed. Luckily, we're out of giant cookie so I have no more temptation. I DO have big brother, so I have a distraction from my stock pile of yummy skinny cow ice cream. So slowly but surely I am going back to my "regular" mind frame. I had 5 chicken fingers for lunch. I did have an ice cream afterwards. Not great choices but after dinner I'll still be within all of my calories and over 1G of fat and  a handful of sugar. Which brings me to my point.

     I use MFP ( http://www.myfitnesspal.com ) to log in everything I eat. I just use the regular basic numbers it gave me when I signed up. Which is 1200Cal, 165Carbs, 40Fat, 24Sugar, and 2,500Sodium. Now I read in the forums on MFP that the Canadian recommended sodium intake is 1500MG, and a friend who is a weight lifter told me I could stick around 2,000MG.  I have no idea what I should be doing! I'm trying to cut out all processed foods/sodium so I'm really unsure where to go here. None of my google-searching has yielded any helpful results. Aaah! For now though I don't think it's too important but when I figure it out... I'll let u know.

     Today is a good day. SNAPS FOR SABRINA.

Skinny Cow Single Serve Cup.

     Now I know that we've all heard of Skinny Cow... and if not, then here it is. Today at Safeway I was walkin along, ignoring the ice cream isle as per usual. Then I see it. The Sundae single serving. Check out the guide, and 11G of fat? No thanks. Sitting right beside it? Skinny cow? Let's check it out... 1.5G of fat. 150 calories? Chocolate Fudge Brownie?!  I THINK I WILL.

     I got home, barely in the door ( thats a lie, i brought in diapers from outside whilst thinking of it) and dived in. DELISH! Totally worth the $1.67 for 157 ml. It was the best 10 minutes of life. I havent had ice cream in 6 weeks. Not that I eat a lot of it, but it was nice to have that treat that didn't taste like crap and ACTUALLY tasted like chocolate. Everybody should try these!! I got two. I might go back tomorrow while they're still on sale. I am going to try cookies and cream next. Yumm.

(this says 2G of fat but my cup says 1.5G)

     I was checking out their website after I got home. They have SO many products I had NO idea!! I thought it was all just ice cream. I'm definitely going to be trying a lot of this!! 

Oh you guys.

     Never fail to make me feel better.  I woke up this morning back to myself. GOOD AS NEW. My friend who I was having the shower for won't be able to make it so I feel like a bagillion tonnes of stress is gone. I cleaned up the babies diapers and they're outside chillin in the sun. re arranged my plants and cleaned off her yard toys. When we come back from our walk, which really isn't going to be much of a walk since we're walking to the doctors and then Safeway lol, we will hang out and get some sun. Maybe we're lacking a little vit D.

   Nothing feels better then a new pair of pants. Adriano brought home a new pair of lulu's for me last night and I love them sooo much. My old ones were looking a little dingy after a year of being my only sweat pants.

Baby calls.

3rd times the charm.

     I did something today. I did something I hadn't done in a very long time. I did it with out deciding to do it. I did it with out a second thought. I did it knowing I shouldn't be doing it. I don't want to go back there. I'm ashamed of myself today.

What can I say?

     I was already at 1000 calories by noon.  I ate PIZZA for breakfast. I ate a whole can of salt & vinegar pringles yesterday. I don't know what happened. Two days ago I was the happiest I remember being in a really long time and one frustrating day and I throw it all out the window. I have no one to blame but myself. Oh well, I'm back to myself right now. It seems so much easier to say oh I already blew it whats one more day, but that will just make it worse. It stops now. We're going to go for a walk, and have a healthy dinner.

Out of control.

     Just stop eating right...  now ok. Thx buddy.